What do you “have to” do? File your taxes? Take out the trash? Make a dental appointment?
Sure, these are minor, mundane obligations that we need to fulfill to maintain our livelihood.
But what happens when the “have to” mindset invades our overarching professional and personal lives?
What happens when professional athletes “have to” condition themselves and lift weights for 2-3 hours a day? What happens when managers “have to” hold weekly update meetings with their sales staff? What happens when moms “have to” drive their children to various sporting events and extracurriculars?
I’ll tell you what happens – senses of dread, obligation, and regret begin to overwhelm and eventually overpower. The athlete dreads his training so much that he begins to lose the agility that once secured his team a championship. The manager feels obliged, rather than excited, to host his weekly meetings. The mom regrets how many other chores and activities she must forego in order to chauffeur her children around town.
To avoid these sentiments of dread, obligation, and regret, I propose one simple solution – ditch the “have to” attitude! Replace it with a “want to” attitude. The “want to” attitude allows you to look forward to your tasks, which energizes you and engages your mind. The “want to” attitude orients your perspective in a way that allows you to appreciate your tasks, your colleagues, and your overall life in a more profound sense. The “want to” attitude carries over into all parts of your life, whether professional, personal, or social.
When that athlete “wants to” train and condition himself, he’ll continually progress in the gym. In fact, he’ll bring a new energy to training that he can use to generate creative workouts that will simultaneously refuel his energy levels. When that manager becomes engaged in his weekly meetings, he will better relate to his team and cultivate an environment that encourages information exchange and idea sharing. When that mom better appreciates her role in facilitating social development opportunities for her children, she will be more willing and excited to introduce her children to even more extracurricular involvements.
The ”want to” attitude produces a virtuous cycle of energy, excitement, and engagement. It enhances your ability to appreciate all things in your life, from the mundane to the exhilarating.
The next time you find yourself “having” to do something, try and reframe your thoughts toward “wanting” to do that task. Do you “have to” do your taxes? Well, hey now, if you’re doing your taxes, that means: 1) you’re literate and 2) you have an income. Both in the United States and around the globe, millions of people cannot claim those same two attributes. You probably won’t legitimately ever “want to” do your taxes (due to paperwork headaches and dreaded time allocation), but if you adopt the “want to” mindset, you may surprise yourself with a slightly more positive and grateful approach in doing your taxes.
Words are powerful. Changing from “have to” to “want to” is powerful. But what’s even more powerful is your mind. Let your new “want to” attitude trickle into your daily tasks, your one-off tasks, and your various goals in life. You may notice that your holistic outlook becomes a little brighter, a little more engaged, and a little more grateful. This enhanced outlook can only serve you as you traverse the waters of your professional, personal, and social life.
I want to thank you for your time, and I want to keep producing content that will help you lead a more purposeful, passionate, and persistent life.
And most importantly, I want you to “want to.” In all aspects of your life.
