-If you haven’t read Part 1, you can access it here–
I wanted a change of venue, so I took an opportunity to pursue my MBA back at the University of Florida, where I completed my undergrad. I was able to just get by in undergrad, so I figured I could muster up just enough effort and diligence to get me through my MBA.
Nope. That didn’t happen.
Not even close.
I rarely opened a textbook for the entire two years of my MBA Program. I had lost the Kyle that excelled in academics and whose sole purpose was to perform better than his peers.
And it was about time! I finally liberated myself as I journeyed through my MBA Program. I can’t explain it, but I TOTALLY transformed.
Sure, I rarely opened a textbook. I had little interest in my coursework, except for my leadership classes.
But this meant that I wasn’t spending hours and hours alone in my room, plugging away at a chapter or an equation.
I was out and about with my peers! I was forming genuine relationships with my classmates and relating to them individually. I looked forward to being with them and learning from them … I even hung out with most of them outside the classroom!
But why this “sudden” transition?
Honestly, I think it’s because I realized I had been given a second chance at college. A second chance at how I approached my peers. A second chance at life. And with this realization, I knew I needed to capitalize on my opportunity.
The first month of the MBA Program really engaged us and created momentum for continued involvement. As I attended multiple seminars every week and participated in professional development events to improve my networking and interview skills, I was forced out of my shell. I faced an urgent decision: either get lost in the shuffle or hop on a board and ride the wave.
I chose to ride the wave. Over the course of one month, I experienced the personal and social benefits of involvement and engagement.
I found myself actively conversing with my peers and genuinely enjoying their company. Whether a group assignment for class, or a mock interview with a peer, or a Friday group dinner at the local sports bar, I soon craved the feelings of community and confidence that accompanied my engagement with classmates. The fact that our academic curriculum emphasized group work was only the beginning; after a short period of time, I was leveraging my new network to help develop my social skills and professional ambitions outside the classroom.
I joined as many initiatives in my MBA Program as I could. Over the course of the Program’s two-year duration, I served as an Executive on the MBA Association, Communications Director on the Program’s student-run apparel business, and co-President of the Program’s GatorFit club, where I devised weekly workouts for club members to complete alongside one another.
I also found a home in my local gym, Go Primal. The gym integrated strength work, CrossFit, and group classes. I developed a tight-knit community at the gym and actively participated in all three fitness offerings. Not necessarily because I wanted to do strength training or a CrossFit class on a particular day, but because I enjoyed the membership of each unique offering and couldn’t pass up the opportunity to connect with the gym’s AWESOME members.
It wasn’t just about taking leadership roles in the Program or breaking a sweat with other gym goers. Even more importantly, I was regularly spending time with my peers in social settings. Just a few months before joining the Program, I could never have imagined actually looking FORWARD to dinners and evening activities with friends.
Talking about forward, let’s fast forward to now … just four months after my MBA Program concluded.
After Program conclusion, I relocated from Florida, where I had spent most of my life with my family, to Atlanta, Georgia.
I took on a consulting job with Cognizant, where I interact with different groups of people on a daily basis.
I recently attended my first wedding, where I didn’t know a single person besides my girlfriend in attendance.
I also accompanied my girlfriend to a work-related Gala, where I knew four people out of the several thousand that showed up.
On an even larger scale, I attended a concert in Madison Square Garden just a few weeks ago. By myself. I knew two other people out of the 18,000 in attendance, but my two friends were sitting in an entirely different section than I was. It was just me, in my section, surrounded by dozens of people dancing and partying.
A few years ago, I never could have imagined accomplishing any of these feats. And although these may not appear grandeur or monumental to most people, I can assure you – these experiences were amazing moments of reflection and personal growth!
Does this mean I’ve conquered my social anxiety? That it no longer exists?
Absolutely NOT!
I still get nervous when speaking with people I don’t know, whether in my consulting profession or strangers I sit next to on the plane.
I was mortified by the idea of entering the dance floor at the wedding reception, with dozens of unfamiliar faces, even though I love to dance.
I had no idea how to approach the tenured professionals at the Gala, and I frequently wondered what I was doing in a conference hall full of successful, established individuals.
And I felt extremely awkward, and out-of-place, during the concert in Madison Square Garden. I wasn’t dancing with friends, and I felt like everyone was watching me slowly redden into a tomato due to sheer discomfort and embarrassment.
I still get anxious in many social environments. Especially if these environments involve a mass number of people that I don’t know. But I choose to engage these environments anyway. Because I know that they will mold me, and that I will actually enjoy them once all is said and done. They will allow me to grow and connect with others in ways that I can never fully appreciate.
-Stay tuned for Part 3, where I provide insights and reflections to help you along your journey-
