Let’s face it. Failure sucks. It feels bad, it makes us question ourselves, and it has a sinister way of seeping into different parts of our lives.
This isn’t the most fun topic to read about, but it’s an important one.
I want you to know that you CAN be confident after failure.
I’m going to give you Tips 6-10 for overcoming failure. If you implement these insights into your life, you will become more confident and equipped in facing any challenge that life throws at you.
And if you want the first 5 tips, click here.
Tip #6 – Talk It Out
You’re feeling the suck of failure. And you’re starting to feel some good vibes from hanging out with loved ones, doing some fun things, and enjoying things you’re good at.
You’ve felt a lot, and you’ve started taking small, tangible action to put you in a better place, mentally and emotionally.
Now I encourage you to open up to someone. Your girlfriend. Your mom or dad. Your closest friend.
I want you to rip off the Band-Aid. When you talk it out, you REALLY make your feelings tangible. You’ll make your failure tangible as well. Your failure will stop being the ghost that haunts you, and it’ll turn into a real target that you can shoot down. Now you can acknowledge your failure, get it out in the open, and take MASSIVE action to get your confidence back.
Tip #7 – Everybody Fails
Do NOT hold back when you’re talking it out. It’s tempting to breeze over your failure and avoid talking about it, since you might think it makes you look weak or inadequate.
When you start opening up about your failure, I want you to remember that EVERYBODY fails. We’re all humans, and we ALL fail.
A lot, actually. It’s a part of life. If you go into your“failure” conversations with this perspective, you’ll be able to open up more easily and get ALL parts of your failure out in the open. Not just the softer parts or the less uncomfortable parts.
You’ll be surprised by how the other person responds. You could get encouragement. You could get a hug. You could get the other person to open up about one of his or her failures. But the other person will ABSOLUTELY understand failure, and will be able to relate to you and help you … if you ask for it.
Tip #8 – Look At Why You Failed
Now that your failure is out in the open and tangible, it’ll start feeling a little less stressful and overwhelming.
Take the next step and look at WHY you failed. Remember that special someone you opened up to about your failure? If you feel comfortable enough, ask THAT person why they think you failed as well. It’s always good to get an outside, more objective perspective.
Did you fail because you lacked information? Did you lack a skill? Did you fall short in networking with the right people to land your dream job?
Look deep into why you failed, so you can identify what needs to be changed to prevent this type of failure in the future.
Tip #9 – Skill Up
Now that you know why you failed, DO something to get better at whatever you’re lacking.
If it’s a lack of information or knowledge, sign up for an online course to educate yourself.
If it’s a lack of skill, something like writing or marketing, there are PLENTY of tools out there that you can use to develop your skills.
Whatever you’re lacking in, take action to get better at it.
Yes, it might bring back feelings of failure at first. “At first” being the optimal wording. If you keep at it, you’ll actually get BETTER at what you lacked, and your confidence will FINALLY start to recover. Whatever it is that took away your confidence in the first place, NOW you’re starting to overcome it and reclaim what’s yours… which is your CONFIDENCE!
And don’t forget to keep doing things that you enjoy and that you’re good at. It’s SO important to keep your spirits high and your dopamine up, especially as you start working on improving the skills you once lacked. And as you improve these skills, your failure will become irrelevant and your confidence will build itself up.
Tip #10 – Shut Up
That’s right, you read this tip correctly. Shut up!
As you skill up, I want you to make your self-doubt SHUT UP. When you start attacking your weaknesses that caused your failure initially, you’ll begin to realize just how bad these weaknesses are. Yourself-doubt, your negative thoughts, and your fears will start to kick into overdrive and try to keep you in a state of mental failure.
I need you to shut off all those negative voices right now. I want you to have one mantra that you tell yourself over and over – “I can do this, I’m going to do this, and I AM doing this.”
When you replace your negative thoughts with this mantra,you’ll empower yourself to focus on skilling up, getting better every day, and turning failure into success.
Make those voices of self-doubt SHUT UP. Their time is long gone. Now it’s your time to get a little better,day by day, and build your confidence gradually as you improve your skills.
Did you like Tips 6-10? Awesome … there are 5 final tips to come in Part 3! Stay tuned …
